Day 344/365: agony

After hearing news of yet another high school shooting, which already makes 18 and we’re only 45 days into the year, I felt crushed. I felt like I was in agony as I watch video clips of a SWAT team entering a classroom to ensure it’s safety with guns raised demanding kids put up their hands. A student in the class was filming it, and panned across to show hands up and in the midst of the sea of hands was a pair of trembling ones. It broke my heart. And it plagued me into the night and this morning. So much trauma, after trauma, after trauma.

An idea came to me about how to get at the root of this issue. There’s been much discussion around gun control and mental health. But those are just symptoms of the problem. At the root is separation and feelings of abandonment and rejection and how those (false) notions obliterated this young gunman’s ability to live in love. He chose fear because that’s what he was being fed. He was put up for adoption. His father died. Then his mother died. He was expelled from schools multiple times. He felt cast out from the beginning and could not see himself anywhere in this world. And we failed him. And we failed every person in that school who witnessed that shooting and was present there.

So what do we do? Well, I reached out to my biz partner and we’re putting our heads together and working to come up with a program that addresses self-worth and how to manage that through the various grade levels. Because if this young gunman felt worthy, felt compassion for himself, felt like he was able to love and be loved, then he would have chosen differently. It sounds so simplistic, but that emotional wounding that we spend our lives living in is costly. Far more costly than we realize until it manifests into dis-ease like this.

We have to do something. We can’t just hope and pray that something changes. And so I’ve committed to doing my part to ensure that our children operate from a place of wholeness instead of feeling broken and unseen.

This emotional wounding affects us all. But with re-learning how to push through the illusion of fear and push the false notion of separation aside and work together as one (human) body, we can heal this. I know we can.

n

 

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