Day 113/365: Raw

So my best friend and I have not spoken for months. Our last exchange was via text and it was not good.
I saved the exchange so that I could revisit it and figure out a way to bridge the gap, but a month or so later my phone died and I had to get a new one. All my text messages stayed on the old phone.
She’s been on my mind lately because there are tons of things I’d love to share with her, but I know right now that’s simply not possible. I’m giving her space I feel she needs and I want to respect that.
But today I was looking through my jewelry box and I stumbled upon a gift she gave me years ago that I love.
It’s a set of three bangles. And each has a different saying on them.
One says: Live the life you’ve imagined.
Another says: Let miracles find you.
And the third: Laugh often. Mend fences and nurture friendships.
It was the last one that really got to me. It made me feel raw and terribly sad. How ironic that the friend I love the most, the one who gave me these bracelets, is the one I have to mend fences with.
I miss her. I wanted and still want to pick up the phone and just call her so we can talk, mend fences, laugh often and nurture our friendship like we used to. But I’m not so sure she’s ready to hear from me just yet. And there’s a small piece of my pride that feel like she should be calling me with the way things were left.
At any rate, I do feel like finding these bracelets is a sign that we are indeed drawing closer to the time when we can reunite as friends. Until that happens, all I can do is wait patiently and let a miracle find me.

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