There are so many possible things that could have thrown me off my game today, including my health, but I simply was not fazed. I don’t know if it was because I was too tired or what, but I was not pressed at all. I didn’t feel pressured into service nor did I feel the need to spring into action.
But interestingly, it was not because I felt numb. It was just that I did not feel the urge to meet someone’s else expectations about what I should or should not be doing. If I wasn’t careful, that same feeling might border on apathy or indifference. But it didn’t feel that way. I’m not sure feeling unfazed is a phase (see what I did there) or if I’m just shifting into some sort of new awareness where things that used to make me stressed no longer seem that crucial.
Can I attribute it to age, to exhaustion? I don’t know. But I do like that it’s happening and that I’m okay with it. I actually used to feel stressed when I wasn’t stressed, but now it just feels good and freeing because it allows room for other nice emotions to enter.
Whatever it can be attributed to, I am ever so grateful. And I hope it’s not a fluke.