Today we went to help a friend figure out what to do with a piece of property now that her father has passed away. She is a only child who had already lost her mother years ago, and she is feeling completely overwhelmed with the number of things she has to resolve in the wake of her dad’s death.
We asked how we could help and she wanted us to come out to the property, assess it and offer suggestions on what she could do. She currently lives in another property full time and this was a second property that her father owned. It was in decent shape, needed quite a bit of updating, was in a great location and had great bones. So ideally she could fix it up and sell it.
When we got there she walked to the kitchen and began talking about how overwhelming everything was and musing about all the possibilities for the property. As she was doing this, she sat down. And as she sat down, she began to lose focus and continue musing. I continued to stand at the kitchen counter and listened. Then it dawned on me that her sitting down was very symbolic of her life. She was taking a seat in her life. And the longer she sat, the greater the overwhelm and worry consumed her.
As I was standing there, I felt like I had a different perspective on the situation—literally and figuratively. Not that I was above her, but simply the act of standing made me feel like the situation was manageable and I could see things that maybe she couldn’t. So I talked with her about her overall end goal. She explained to me what that was. Then I told her that her best bet would be to simply offload the property, as is and walk away. Then I told her I would work with her to create a to do list so she could feel like the project at hand was manageable.
It made me realize that I need to do more standing up in my own life. Standing up and using my voice. Standing up and being my authentic self. Standing up for the values and ideas I believe in. I feel standing up is showing up in your life and breeds peace in your life and so much more authentic joy. But honestly I feel like sometimes we believe just the opposite. The issue is the discomfort we feel when we do stand up because it can feel so unfamiliar and makes us feel vulnerable.
If standing up means feeling uncomfortable, being vulnerable but steadily moving toward progress, I’ll take it.