I woke up this morning feeling incredibly grateful. I have a daily practice in place of writing down all the things I’m grateful for as soon as I wake. It’s a 5-minute process and usually I can fill the 5 minutes with all sorts of new and wonderful things.
Lately though I’ve been feeling like the things I write feel rote, like it’s an assignment and I’m just filling in the blanks. Basically, phoning it in, like you’re not really there, puttin’ in work. But this morning I felt a renewed sense of gratitude.
I felt hopeful about things on the horizon. I am working on a big web project that has been frustrating for weeks and I finally had a breakthrough that feels like I have momentum. Other projects I’m working on are also moving ahead, which feels great.
There is a concern with this though. I would like to be sure that the gratitude is not connected to things going well. That feels dangerous to me. Like only when things go well can you feel grateful.
I don’t believe that’s true for me, but I still feel the need to check in with myself to be sure that’s not the case. Maybe it’s what you focus on. If you get into a pattern of focusing on the stuff that’s going right vs. the shit that’s kicking you in the gut then maybe you can create more of the good-feeling stuff.
That’s probably how it works. I can honestly say that there have been some very rough days these past few years, but when I choose to remind myself of all that’s going well, I do feel better and the day seems to go better. Or at least I feel better in the moment.
However it works, it feels really good to feel genuinely grateful—again.